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Q&A: Was i Wrong to pass up sex with a drunken friend?
Question by Slick: Was i Wrong to pass up sex with a drunken friend?
A couple weeks ago at a party i was at with a very clse friend that i have feelings for. I was not drinking, but she was, So at the end of the night i took her back to my place and carried her up the stairs and put her in my bed to sleep. But after “tucking” her in she pulled my arm and said “i love you” and “take off my pants”. I just said get some sleep and i’ll see you in the morning. Then she said. “dont you love me” I was very confused as to what to do. but i just turned off the light and went an slept of the couch.
When morning came around, she came out of my room and asked me what happened and how she got in my room. i told her what happened.
Then she asked me, “Didnt you want to have sex?” I said. its not sex when one person doesnt remember it.
As i said before i have feeling for this girl and i hope i made the right decisions. in passing up the opportunity.
I would rather wait for the right time then mess things up.
And after all this was done, she thanked me.
Best answer:
Answer by cblrdy
That was exactly the right thing.
Add your own answer in the comments!
You are a true gentleman. You did grand!
It sounds like you have already answered your question. You would prefer to wait and have a meaningful relationship rather than just hook up. Personally she sounds like a ho and you should have just done her & dumped her, but what the hell have it your way.
That was a good move and one that will probably cause her to respect you a lot more.
There are laws in a lot of places that protect those who are intoxicated. In fact, six different people were arrested in my town for having sex with intoxicated women they knew. The police looked at this as a form of “date rape” where the women knew their attackers. Drunk or not, no means no. In addition, since their judgment is impaired, the act wouldn’t be between “two consenting adults”.
You had an opportunity, like they did, to take advantage of a situation. You handled it very, very well. Kudos to you!
That was the right thing to do. If you did have sex with her in the night, then it would not be considered as sex but taking advantage of a drunk person, may even be considered as rape if that person does decide to file charges.
Belive me, you have done a very noble thing. Any lesser man would jump at her in a heartbeat. You should be proud of yourself. And I am pretty sure you have earned her trust and respect. Perhaps you and her will have a future together. Just give it time to develop. Hats off to you.
I think you did the right thing. If you had and it didn’t work out it could cause some pain later. Ask her about it when she’s sober and then try. To “do her and dump her” would cause pain for the both of you.
You did the right thing. She was drunk and not making a decision. She just wanted some. If you are interested in her, let her know or go out. Don’t let your feelings hide in you. It is not good for you.
You will, in the end, win the girl. If it is not this girl then you have your answer about her true feelings and her virtue.
You did the best thing, you were gallant, respectful, and a true gentleman. This woman, or any other that you may end up with, is truly lucky!
No, you were not wrong, you were a gentleman. FYI, sex with an incapacitated person is rape, because they are too drunk to consent.
A lot of guys, or I should say 99% would have done her. You did what you thought was right. She will respect you in the end. This may be a wakeup call too, maybe her true feelings were shown, maybe she is hot for you
nope i think what you did was perfect, if ya got feelings for her ask her out or soemthing